I didn't want to become a member and then have to pay to work as I had no money, and I wondered if this was it. I looked in my bag and there was my 'Horses for Dummies' book. Were all the horses out? I hadn't seen any on my walk toward the reception area. I would have to tell Buffie no horse and no manure and she would be disappointed.
But I did have one thing, and it was a voucher for a free hot drink at Korero cafe.
Seeing I had nothing to lose except my dignity, I got the courage to say again to the reception lady, I can run and get you a coffee you look like you need it.
She looked a bit shocked but I said, for being so welcoming while you are so busy it's on me. What would you like - cappucino, flat white, latte?
Oh, latte if you don't mind.
One latte coming up. Be quicker if I had a horse but it's only down the road.
She said sorry all our horses are out but...there is a donkey in the far paddock you could ride.
I'll take the donkey.
Sunday, 23 April 2017
Wednesday, 12 April 2017
The day the oil ran out (8)
Are you a member?
A lady eyed me suspiciously at the reception desk. She was sitting behind a computer, and it looked like she had just finished scrolling down a Facebook page. She had a squint in her eye and itchy fingers.
Um no..I'm here about a job.
Not another job hunter. The circular file is now full. She muttered.
I didn't understand what she meant by the circular file. I pressed on..can I see your manager?
No, she's out. You didn't park in the leased carpark did you? That's for members.
No, I walked. um..hey, you look like you need a coffee break.
Tell me about it, she said. But I must get this work done.
Well, I could make you a coffee and bring it to your desk? I suggested.
The reception lady gave me a look like I was mad. She was now debating whether to employ me so she could do more work. But instead she changed tack and said if you want to be a member it's $425 a year, the forms are over there. Fill out an application form and we will get back to you. Then you can join our working bees.
Then she went back to her Facebook page.
A lady eyed me suspiciously at the reception desk. She was sitting behind a computer, and it looked like she had just finished scrolling down a Facebook page. She had a squint in her eye and itchy fingers.
Um no..I'm here about a job.
Not another job hunter. The circular file is now full. She muttered.
I didn't understand what she meant by the circular file. I pressed on..can I see your manager?
No, she's out. You didn't park in the leased carpark did you? That's for members.
No, I walked. um..hey, you look like you need a coffee break.
Tell me about it, she said. But I must get this work done.
Well, I could make you a coffee and bring it to your desk? I suggested.
The reception lady gave me a look like I was mad. She was now debating whether to employ me so she could do more work. But instead she changed tack and said if you want to be a member it's $425 a year, the forms are over there. Fill out an application form and we will get back to you. Then you can join our working bees.
Then she went back to her Facebook page.
Saturday, 8 April 2017
The day the oil ran out (7)
Not to be outdone by a thief I stowed my books into my bag and trudged onward to the Massey Pony Club.
I don't understand why the Massey Pony Club is in Ranui, I thought to myself. Shouldn't it be named Ranui Pony Club? There better be some ponies there.
Upon reaching the entrance I hiked over the turnstile. Did it matter I was not a member? And that I only came here for the free horse manure? I was not in the age demographic to be taught pony riding skills. However sometimes children mistook me to be their peer, disbelieving me when I told them how old I really was. Perhaps, like me, one of the ponies had grown up and been put out to pasture.
I looked around at the idyllic scene. Green fields and shady pine groves, with jumping bars and steeples dotted around the place. No ponies to be seen. I walked on to the stables and hall.
I had put in my CV my stint looking after animals at the Swanson Veterinary Clinic. That I was a long term member of the SPCA, and SAFE, and fundraiser for Lonely Miaow. Granted, none of these were pony related but I thought it might be more relevant than saying I had worked at my Uncle's Chinese Takeaway, feeding the masses who were too lazy to cook their own dinners.
Dear Lord, I prayed. Please let there be a job for me here. My Dad cannot live on chips and ice cream forever. Also, whoever took my bike either repent or you have a special place reserved for bicycle thieves in hell!
I don't understand why the Massey Pony Club is in Ranui, I thought to myself. Shouldn't it be named Ranui Pony Club? There better be some ponies there.
Upon reaching the entrance I hiked over the turnstile. Did it matter I was not a member? And that I only came here for the free horse manure? I was not in the age demographic to be taught pony riding skills. However sometimes children mistook me to be their peer, disbelieving me when I told them how old I really was. Perhaps, like me, one of the ponies had grown up and been put out to pasture.
I looked around at the idyllic scene. Green fields and shady pine groves, with jumping bars and steeples dotted around the place. No ponies to be seen. I walked on to the stables and hall.
I had put in my CV my stint looking after animals at the Swanson Veterinary Clinic. That I was a long term member of the SPCA, and SAFE, and fundraiser for Lonely Miaow. Granted, none of these were pony related but I thought it might be more relevant than saying I had worked at my Uncle's Chinese Takeaway, feeding the masses who were too lazy to cook their own dinners.
Dear Lord, I prayed. Please let there be a job for me here. My Dad cannot live on chips and ice cream forever. Also, whoever took my bike either repent or you have a special place reserved for bicycle thieves in hell!
Monday, 6 March 2017
The day the oil ran out (6)
I kept on my way to the Massey Pony Club, momentarily distracted by the Ranui Library. Well I had to go in, hadn't I? There might be a book to read!
I chained up my bicycle and walked through the doors. Bunny the librarian was at the desk. Seeing I wasn't a child, she didn't buttonhole me. No requests, but I always made sure I looked on the withdrawn trolley. Never know what you would find for 50 cents.
'Wendyl Nissen's granny recipes' hmm, makes a change from 'Bitch and Famous' I remarked to nobody in particular. There was also '50 Shades Darker' and 'The Dangerous Book for Girls'. Another, that looked appealing was called 'The Hunger Pains'.
Why can't there be a book on how to ride horses? I went upstairs to non-fiction.
I kept looking. Sure enough one popped out at me 'Horses for Dummies'. That will do.
I then checked out "I quit sugar!" (for Dad) and "Chinese Cinderella, a tale of an unwanted daughter' (for mum). "How to live off the smell of an oily rag" also looked promising.
I went back downstairs to check my books out when Librarian Linda came up to me and said is your bike the pink bike? I'm afraid it's been stolen. I saw a man riding off with it.
What? I thought I chained it up?!
Sure enough the chains had been chopped clear with bolt cutters. My bicycle was now in the wilds of Ranui with some man joy riding it, illegally.
That was just great. Linda looked at me and shrugged. "Desperate times call for desperate measures", she mused. "Are you ok to get home?"
I sighed, it would just take me longer with these books to carry, but I'll cope.
I guess I could report it to the police.
Linda looked sympathetic. I told her I would just find a horse at the pony club. Maybe they would loan me one in compensation.
Good luck, said Linda.
I chained up my bicycle and walked through the doors. Bunny the librarian was at the desk. Seeing I wasn't a child, she didn't buttonhole me. No requests, but I always made sure I looked on the withdrawn trolley. Never know what you would find for 50 cents.
'Wendyl Nissen's granny recipes' hmm, makes a change from 'Bitch and Famous' I remarked to nobody in particular. There was also '50 Shades Darker' and 'The Dangerous Book for Girls'. Another, that looked appealing was called 'The Hunger Pains'.
Why can't there be a book on how to ride horses? I went upstairs to non-fiction.
I kept looking. Sure enough one popped out at me 'Horses for Dummies'. That will do.
I then checked out "I quit sugar!" (for Dad) and "Chinese Cinderella, a tale of an unwanted daughter' (for mum). "How to live off the smell of an oily rag" also looked promising.
I went back downstairs to check my books out when Librarian Linda came up to me and said is your bike the pink bike? I'm afraid it's been stolen. I saw a man riding off with it.
What? I thought I chained it up?!
Sure enough the chains had been chopped clear with bolt cutters. My bicycle was now in the wilds of Ranui with some man joy riding it, illegally.
That was just great. Linda looked at me and shrugged. "Desperate times call for desperate measures", she mused. "Are you ok to get home?"
I sighed, it would just take me longer with these books to carry, but I'll cope.
I guess I could report it to the police.
Linda looked sympathetic. I told her I would just find a horse at the pony club. Maybe they would loan me one in compensation.
Good luck, said Linda.
Tuesday, 28 February 2017
The day the oil ran out (5)
I peddle my pink bike out of the garage. I didn't deliberately choose this colour, the bike man at the bike shop chose it for me. However on the plus side, it means no boys would dare steal a pink bicycle.
I put on my helmet and face the road, now nearly completely empty of vehicles. Wow. I had never seen it like this before, and it's eerily quiet except for the faint sound of Mr Whippy in the distance.
Massey Pony Club. That's out west. I head in a westerly direction, toward the hills. On the way to Swanson Road I see someone walking along with a huge hat and she calls out to me.
"Hey Selina! Can I be in your story?"
I think to myself, hmm that's weird. How does she know I'm writing a story about this? Have I just broken past the wall? Am I experiencing the twilight zone that all athletes and runners do while running for any length of time before they collapse? But I'm only on Swanson Road! Perhaps I don't have enough water, am dehydrated and what I'm seeing is a mirage...
I peddle closer and see that it's Buffie, my garden tutor. She's smiling at me, but then she's always smiling. I don't have the gift of permanent smiling face expression. I'm wrinkling my brow trying to make my brain cells work.
"Hi Buffie! I'm sorry what did you just say?" I slow down right beside the foot path.
She repeats "Can I be in your story?"
Before I have time to formulate a considered answer I find myself saying "Sure! I'm heading to Massey Pony Club".
"Wow great minds think alike. I need some horse manure for the garden. I was thinking of getting some but its going to be hard yards hauling it without a vehicle"
"Well that's why I'm thinking of finding a job there, perhaps they can lend me a horse and then we could have horse manure all year round".
"Sounds like a good idea to me".
Buffie is still smiling. She then says "Sorry I can't stay chat but let me know and maybe we can sort something out. By the way are you into Game of Thrones monopoly?"
I say.."Uh not really, never heard of it. I'm more of a Scrabble person"
She says "It's an excellent game. You should try it sometime"
And then she waves me goodbye.
Huh. Random!
I put on my helmet and face the road, now nearly completely empty of vehicles. Wow. I had never seen it like this before, and it's eerily quiet except for the faint sound of Mr Whippy in the distance.
Massey Pony Club. That's out west. I head in a westerly direction, toward the hills. On the way to Swanson Road I see someone walking along with a huge hat and she calls out to me.
"Hey Selina! Can I be in your story?"
I think to myself, hmm that's weird. How does she know I'm writing a story about this? Have I just broken past the wall? Am I experiencing the twilight zone that all athletes and runners do while running for any length of time before they collapse? But I'm only on Swanson Road! Perhaps I don't have enough water, am dehydrated and what I'm seeing is a mirage...
I peddle closer and see that it's Buffie, my garden tutor. She's smiling at me, but then she's always smiling. I don't have the gift of permanent smiling face expression. I'm wrinkling my brow trying to make my brain cells work.
"Hi Buffie! I'm sorry what did you just say?" I slow down right beside the foot path.
She repeats "Can I be in your story?"
Before I have time to formulate a considered answer I find myself saying "Sure! I'm heading to Massey Pony Club".
"Wow great minds think alike. I need some horse manure for the garden. I was thinking of getting some but its going to be hard yards hauling it without a vehicle"
"Well that's why I'm thinking of finding a job there, perhaps they can lend me a horse and then we could have horse manure all year round".
"Sounds like a good idea to me".
Buffie is still smiling. She then says "Sorry I can't stay chat but let me know and maybe we can sort something out. By the way are you into Game of Thrones monopoly?"
I say.."Uh not really, never heard of it. I'm more of a Scrabble person"
She says "It's an excellent game. You should try it sometime"
And then she waves me goodbye.
Huh. Random!
Thursday, 23 February 2017
The day the oil ran out (4)
I won't think about it today. I will think about it tomorrow. After all, tomorrow...is another day!
Why the lines from Gone with the Wind were popping into my brain I had no idea. WWSOD?
What would Scarlett O'Hara do?
I thought back to the classic 1939 movie (and book) which I had seen about, oh, at least 50 times.
Scarlett, when faced with poverty and needing $500 to pay the taxes on Tara, made a dress out of her ma's portieres and went about trying to seduce Rhett Butler.
However that plan didn't work because Rhett Butler had no money. And was in jail.
As for any of the eligible bachelors I knew they might as well have been in jail with no money, because they all had their own bills to pay. The whole curtain plan was not even feasible since mum's taste in curtains was not likely to yield anything remotely wearable.
I just needed to escape to an even richer country and marry some gullible man there. Like mother, like daughter? Noo I did NOT want to be like my mum, who once confided in me that the worst thing she ever did was marry dad. Dad, was thankfully not around to hear because he had his headphones on listening to Vinyl Revival.
Well nothing for it, I was going to have to find a job. I opened up trademe and began looking for a job that would pay..at least 25K a year considering these bills. Hmm make it 30K because I hadn't included food. Or plants. No make it 40K. But before I could type in the pay scale the internet froze up and I couldn't make it work. Huh.
Surely I could find a job by the end of the day before the debt collectors came? Or maybe I could sell something. My car for scrap? Since there wasn't going to be any oil I couldn't run it anymore. I'd just have to bike or learn how to ride a horse.
Yes. With that in mind, I thought were the nearest horses would be. Massey Pony Club?
It might take me half an hour or more by bike.
Dad! I'm going to the pony club. Be back when I've found a job!
Dad said ok. I will close the gate. Can't have the dogs coming in and eating our last chicken!
Why the lines from Gone with the Wind were popping into my brain I had no idea. WWSOD?
What would Scarlett O'Hara do?
I thought back to the classic 1939 movie (and book) which I had seen about, oh, at least 50 times.
Scarlett, when faced with poverty and needing $500 to pay the taxes on Tara, made a dress out of her ma's portieres and went about trying to seduce Rhett Butler.
However that plan didn't work because Rhett Butler had no money. And was in jail.
As for any of the eligible bachelors I knew they might as well have been in jail with no money, because they all had their own bills to pay. The whole curtain plan was not even feasible since mum's taste in curtains was not likely to yield anything remotely wearable.
I just needed to escape to an even richer country and marry some gullible man there. Like mother, like daughter? Noo I did NOT want to be like my mum, who once confided in me that the worst thing she ever did was marry dad. Dad, was thankfully not around to hear because he had his headphones on listening to Vinyl Revival.
Well nothing for it, I was going to have to find a job. I opened up trademe and began looking for a job that would pay..at least 25K a year considering these bills. Hmm make it 30K because I hadn't included food. Or plants. No make it 40K. But before I could type in the pay scale the internet froze up and I couldn't make it work. Huh.
Surely I could find a job by the end of the day before the debt collectors came? Or maybe I could sell something. My car for scrap? Since there wasn't going to be any oil I couldn't run it anymore. I'd just have to bike or learn how to ride a horse.
Yes. With that in mind, I thought were the nearest horses would be. Massey Pony Club?
It might take me half an hour or more by bike.
Dad! I'm going to the pony club. Be back when I've found a job!
Dad said ok. I will close the gate. Can't have the dogs coming in and eating our last chicken!
Tuesday, 21 February 2017
The day the oil ran out (3)
Power $63
Water $26
Sky Subscription $37
Rates $598
Insurance $327
AA Membership $89
Car registration $215
Dental $180
Radio fee $92
School $350
Broadband $80
The bills were piling up. I did a quick calculation and saw I owed... $2057 this month and then I did another quick calculation and saw I had nothing in the bank. Because I had no job. Or income. And therefore, no money.
Dad didn't seem to worry though because he was over 65 and on the pension, I was under 65 and on..nothing.
Dad, why are these bills in my name?
Dad looked at me blankly and said, didn't you know, you now have power of attorney.
I what?
Dad said, you sort it out. Your mum said I was going senile and couldn't be responsible anymore for the house, and its now in your name. So all the bills are too.
Since when?
Since she decided to leave us and go back to Hong Kong.
Hold on, she said she was only going for a week or so.
Dad said, that my annoyingness had got to her and she decided to abdicate responsibility of being a mother, and since I objected to selling the house, bulldozing it to make into a block of flats and selling it to the highest bidder, she had run away to some rich friends in Hong Kong.
You're kidding me.
Dad said gravely no it's very true.
Huh. I sat down. Well this is just dandy.
And then I wondered what rich friends in Hong Kong mum could possibly have. She always told me she grew up in poverty in a 40 storey government building and ate bread crusts for dinner and gave anything she earned to her mother while slaving away in a sweatshirt factory. Or sweatshop. I forget which. While simultaneously looking after her seven brothers and sisters. Could it be she was lying to me about the sweatshirt factory?
Water $26
Sky Subscription $37
Rates $598
Insurance $327
AA Membership $89
Car registration $215
Dental $180
Radio fee $92
School $350
Broadband $80
The bills were piling up. I did a quick calculation and saw I owed... $2057 this month and then I did another quick calculation and saw I had nothing in the bank. Because I had no job. Or income. And therefore, no money.
Dad didn't seem to worry though because he was over 65 and on the pension, I was under 65 and on..nothing.
Dad, why are these bills in my name?
Dad looked at me blankly and said, didn't you know, you now have power of attorney.
I what?
Dad said, you sort it out. Your mum said I was going senile and couldn't be responsible anymore for the house, and its now in your name. So all the bills are too.
Since when?
Since she decided to leave us and go back to Hong Kong.
Hold on, she said she was only going for a week or so.
Dad said, that my annoyingness had got to her and she decided to abdicate responsibility of being a mother, and since I objected to selling the house, bulldozing it to make into a block of flats and selling it to the highest bidder, she had run away to some rich friends in Hong Kong.
You're kidding me.
Dad said gravely no it's very true.
Huh. I sat down. Well this is just dandy.
And then I wondered what rich friends in Hong Kong mum could possibly have. She always told me she grew up in poverty in a 40 storey government building and ate bread crusts for dinner and gave anything she earned to her mother while slaving away in a sweatshirt factory. Or sweatshop. I forget which. While simultaneously looking after her seven brothers and sisters. Could it be she was lying to me about the sweatshirt factory?
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